Hello boys and girls. In today's installment of WTF, we're going to discuss a commercial I heard on the radio yesterday. It was a commercial for Pepsi Max and talked about how this was a diet drink for men. One of the last lines said that drinking Pepsi Max would let you look your cojones in the eye. Really? That's supposed to make me want to drink this stuff? Unless you're into homoerotic contortionism, I can't see how staring at your own balls would make you want to drink a soft drink.
And if you're balls have eyes that you can look into, man, you've got a whole other set of problems!
Friday, January 23, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Public Service Annoucement
Last Friday a group of swolls descended on Maggiano's to eat family style. If you're not familiar, family style is pretty much a buffet that they bring to your table. You just say you want more chicken parmesean and they bring you another plate. You never have to get up!
Unfortunately there are unforeseen consequences of such gluttony. Witness the picture to the right.
Actually, that picture was taken before we started eating because afterwards nobody could move. I went from hungry straight to miserable. I completely bypassed full, stuffed, and uncomfortable. When I got home that night I weighed myself just for kicks. I weighed 208.5 Friday morning and 217 when I got home from Maggiano's. I gained 8.5 pounds during the day and most of that was supper! And it was awesome!
Friday, January 16, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
The World Series...
...of Beer Pong!
Meggan Monroe sent me this link earlier this afternoon. Man, for $50,000 I can drink beer and throw ping pong balls into cups!
This probably is the only World Series in which I could participate although I've only played Beer Pong once in my life. I will admit that I was pretty good at throwing ping pong balls and drinking beer (mostly at drinking beer though).
I may be getting too old to go through all the necessary training to become a pro, though. After all, take a look at this excerpt...
The 6'4", 280-pound Hamilton chugged a bottle of Jack Daniel's beforehand. "The key today," he said later, "was me getting real drunk."
Now that, my friends, is a finely tuned athletic machine. How can I hope to compete against that?
Meggan Monroe sent me this link earlier this afternoon. Man, for $50,000 I can drink beer and throw ping pong balls into cups!
This probably is the only World Series in which I could participate although I've only played Beer Pong once in my life. I will admit that I was pretty good at throwing ping pong balls and drinking beer (mostly at drinking beer though).
I may be getting too old to go through all the necessary training to become a pro, though. After all, take a look at this excerpt...
The 6'4", 280-pound Hamilton chugged a bottle of Jack Daniel's beforehand. "The key today," he said later, "was me getting real drunk."
Now that, my friends, is a finely tuned athletic machine. How can I hope to compete against that?
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Wow, I suck...
...as a blogger. How is it possible that I haven't posted a single thing in the new year?
I'm sure most everybody knows that Liz got off bed rest last week. That's been a huge relief. I'm going to tell on her now. We went out to dinner last Thursday night to celebrate. While we were sitting at the table she turns to me and says that she didn't realize how heavy her stomach was. She's been laying down for the last 12 weeks and wasn't used to standing up and carrying the full weight of her new stomach.
On Friday Liz went to get her haircut. I went with her and ran some errands while she was under the scissors. After the haircut we went out to lunch at Melvin's in downtown Fuquay. Then we drove down to Campbell to deliver some files to her office and visit some of her co-workers. It was pretty awesome to go on a min-road trip with Liz!
What else is new? I got some money for my birthday and Christmas, and after much hemming and hawing, I decided to buy an XBox 360. So that's cool. I've been playing Halo 3 and blowing crap up for the last couple of days. You want to know my favorite feature? The wireless controller that can turn on and off the whole console. Now I can sit in my chair all the way across the room and completely control the console without getting up. It's the ultimate in lazy!
Well, back to watching Scrubs. Later.
I'm sure most everybody knows that Liz got off bed rest last week. That's been a huge relief. I'm going to tell on her now. We went out to dinner last Thursday night to celebrate. While we were sitting at the table she turns to me and says that she didn't realize how heavy her stomach was. She's been laying down for the last 12 weeks and wasn't used to standing up and carrying the full weight of her new stomach.
On Friday Liz went to get her haircut. I went with her and ran some errands while she was under the scissors. After the haircut we went out to lunch at Melvin's in downtown Fuquay. Then we drove down to Campbell to deliver some files to her office and visit some of her co-workers. It was pretty awesome to go on a min-road trip with Liz!
What else is new? I got some money for my birthday and Christmas, and after much hemming and hawing, I decided to buy an XBox 360. So that's cool. I've been playing Halo 3 and blowing crap up for the last couple of days. You want to know my favorite feature? The wireless controller that can turn on and off the whole console. Now I can sit in my chair all the way across the room and completely control the console without getting up. It's the ultimate in lazy!
Well, back to watching Scrubs. Later.
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